508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize