talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
