You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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