i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Randomize
