somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
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