My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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