I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
