Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Randomize
