rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize