well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
