Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
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