my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
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