At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
