their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
even my farts smell like vagina
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
