if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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