the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Randomize