ya dads aren't the best wingmen
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
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I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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