All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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