Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Randomize
