I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
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