The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
