So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment