I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
I need a beard to bite.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
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