Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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