He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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