Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
