At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize