HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Drake has all the answers
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Randomize
