Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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