? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
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