I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a bag of teeth...
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize