If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize
