I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
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