we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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