The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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