Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
