weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
