To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Randomize
