and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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