I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize