bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize
