Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
