Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
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So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
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