how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
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