We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
barbara walters just said penis...
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Randomize
