If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
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