What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
