I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
be right there i have to get my cape
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
