You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Floor bacon is actually really good
Randomize
