do herpes really smell.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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