i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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